Friday, February 23, 2007

Daily Update

Yesterday was a nice day (in the afternoon). I followed Kristen around Westwood for
a little bit as she went to some office building. I think she's getting a job with
the mob. I only know of mobsters who work in office buildings like the one where
she was going. I think the dental thing is a cover up. Its the perfect cover. No
one would ever guess, (except me!). I was so happy to see someone I knew not
related to work, so I was frantically waving my hands like a circus clown in order
to get her attention. no response. I then started yelling. Again, nothing. Then
I started thinking: 'Oh wait, thats not her'. But then it turns out she had the
i-pod on and was looking the other direction the whole time. I invited her to go to
lunch with me, but she mumbled something about not wanting me to splash food on her
before an 'important meeting' she had. (What mobster goes in for the kill looking
anything less than great? exactly!) She also said something about being in the
family business.

In an effort to battle the rising favoritism of the Visiting Teachers in the ward, I
decided to start bringing sweets and treats when I go Home Teaching. Not that it
should be a competition, but I've heard complaints from some people that the guys
don't bring treats if they come over, and the girls do apparently.

I made an effort to show up at Kim Harrison's girl-party, but time just didn't
allow. By the time I phoned over there, it was simply to late. But I assure you I
DID want to do whatever I could to embarrass her, as well as have Renee pay up on a
promise, (wink wink).

After hanging out with the rest of the J-crew at night, I went home and started my
nightly work out. It was Arms and Back day. I don't know if you could hear me
counting from the other room, I did over a thousand reps. I know its boring, but
it's my life. [strong Anchorman reference there in case you've forgotten.]

I woke up really early today, at 7am. I don't know what I was thinking by doing
that. And because I got up early, do you think I made it to work on time? Of
course not. Still 15 min. late.

I had lunch in Beverly Hills today with a friend of mine. Did I tell you last time
that I got lost over there. And I forgot where I parked too. It's only kind of
funny now, cause it sure wasn't then! This time I resolved that by just parking
where they work. Traffic there sucks!

That's it. Kind of a boring day it might seem like. But don't worry, I'll make
sure to do something illegal this weekend, to make Monday's update exciting :)

I'm listening to Johnny Cash right now, Yesterday I forgot to say that I was hearing
'big in Japan'.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Daily Update

First off, my apoligies if you got two copies of yesterday's update. I completely
blame my internet. And due to the fact that it sometimes takes about an hour for me
to craft these little bundles of in-box joy, that could have had something to do
with it as well.

Yesterday I got an email from Mel Karmazin, CEO of Sirius Satalite radio. He just
wanted to mention that Sirius and XM (competitor) were thinking about a merger and
he just wanted to get my opinion, and if I had any suggestions for him. Similarly,
I recieved just this morning an email from David Neeleman, CEO of JetBlue Airlines.
He sent out an email to all of his company apoligizing for last weeks debockel. But
he sent me one as well asking if I had any other suggestions other than what we had
already spoken about earlier in the week. I'm feeling pretty high and mighty
dealing with all these CEO big shots. [i sigh as I put my feet up on my desk while
clasping my hands behind my head with a big 'crap-eatin grin' on my face].

p.s. My boss got business cards for me today. Wow, hey everybody, come and see how
cool I am. Oh wait, but that means more responsibility... oh boy. I'm not sure
I'm ready for it yet.

So after work I was considering going for a victory run for the previous day, but on
the way to consider that I stopped by Diddy Reese (cookie store). Oops. I'm not
positive, but when I got up to the counter, instead of saying "can I help you sir",
I swear the guy said "what do you want Fatty?" Everyone there has a thick
spanish/mexican accent, so I could be wrong, but hey... thats what I heard, I sware!
Then I get home and decide to talk with Eric about how great American Idol has
been lately. Then I started 'Fighting the Battle of my Life'. Then Jeff called.
It was about that point that I realized that my 'Victory Lap', was turning into a
'Victory Sit-down'. And tonight I have something else, so maybe tomorrow.

At Jeff's, after Panda Express beckoned me, I started telling Evan what my plans
were for his 'batchelor' party. oh ya, Mary was there too. He he he. We were then
talking about this years performance of the Gong Show. Its going to be pretty hard
to top last seasons 'River Dance', but I think we have a few hidden gems:)

I then woke up to a lovely European morning. I forgave my alarm clock. We're still
on the rocks, but I expect a full recovery after a few days.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Daily Update

Renee actually came running with me yesterday. It was fun. We were like a pack of
wild baby Impala's. (A younger version of the antelope, which is a step behind the
Gazelle in my opinion.) Granted, she will have to make her own animalistic
comparisons, that's just what I'd say. She warned me at the beginning that she had
a possible injury, that might act up, so when she showed pain, I had to show
caution. You never know what an injured impala would do when you get close.
Personally, I think she was holding back. She was being kind and didn't want to
show me up. With me I can run(well...jog is a better word), and I can go faster in
a straight line, but with Rennie, oh its different, she's like a fox, who can cut
corners on a dime, or stop and start in a split second. dangerous I tell you,
dangerous! There were a few people who passed us, but I didn't feel bad cause they
all had on Marathon, Triathalon, or 'I run for a living' type t-shirts on. I think
we all know that I could have kicked every one of their asses if needed. We made
good time around the track. On the home stretch we sprinted. It had been a while
for a full sprint for me, but man was I good. I was gracefull like Ballet and swift
like a Cheeta. I was in perfect form. High knees, straight back, locked elbows,
and chin up with the air flowing swiftly by my aerodynamic form. It felt like I was
dancing from cloud to cloud. (Of corse from behind I can just imagine Renee saying
I looked like a computer nerd sprinting to the video game sale rack. But her
opinion doesnt' count cause its my part of the story :) After shattering the finish
line I wanted to yell as loud as I could "Hey everybody, come and see how good I
looK", but then my exhaustion quickly set in and so I didn't.

Jeff came over later, after he broke into the girls' 'Panty Party'; he heard I was
making food. Not for the faint of heart indeed, I think Jeff was scared into not
saying anything about it other than 'they had good deserts'. That whimp:) He
obviously didn't want to talk about it, or Someone scared him into not divulging any
girl secrets.

Linda texted me last night. Did everyone else get 4 of the same message from her?
:) jeff and I called to harass her about that as we were watching Man vs. Wild,
(Bear was in Moab in this episode)

My alarm clock and I are currently not on speaking terms. I'm mad at it for being
loud, annoying, and disruptive at inappropriate times.

I'm listening to a combination of Guns n Roses and European Techno.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Daily Update

So apparently Kristen thinks my updates are a tad bit to long, so in an effort not
to scare her away from the super-exciting life of jim, I'll try to edit it down for

Yesterday: After leaving work I strolled home. Not excited about the days past
events at work, I came home to a huge pile of dishes and mess. "OH ya, I should
have done those yesterday!" is how the saying usually goes. Sometimes it gets as
far as "Oh Boy, I should have fixed that last week!", but not wanting another one of
those messes I dove into the kitchen. Oh ya, I remember why I told jeff why I DO
NOT like it when people test spaghetti by throwing it against a cabinet/wall. Its
Because those retards who do that NEVER remove the sticky noodles from the
cabinet/wall! so My simple dish cleaning job turned into a wall/cabinet/floor
cleaning job. I haven't even checked the ceiling yet.

At Family Home Evening there was to be an exciting game of Trivia, boys vs. girls.
It was a cross between Jeopardy and Trivial pursuit. Logan offered to have it side
vs. side, but the girls demanded the Sexist game. It was actually kind of fun, not
that I knew many of the answers. There were more guys, and as expected, the guys
were much more stressed about being competitive. by the end some of the girls were
getting vicious, and luckily we had Tyson to make our rude/sexist/dumb comments.
My favorite moments were when the guys were asked a question, Bethany knew the
answer apparently because she lept in the air and let out a yelp in a peculure
manner, announcing her knowledge. interesting... And then another time the guys
were asked a question about how many downloads from I-tunes have there been. the
guys got it wrong and the girls were correct. But unrelenting, at least a dozen
guys felt robbed and wanted a source. Well, Logan was using a version of Trivial
Persuit that was about two years old, but Good ol' Danny Koontz, the argumentitive
Law student he is, ran into the clerks office, fired up the internet where Apple
quotes how many downloads to its stockholders a different than was originally read,
So he prints this article off and marches into the gym and announces his evidence.
Thats my Danny.

Afterwords Josh Jeff and I go over to Kristen's flat and hang out. She kicked us
out after the other two j's started to sleep. Then we continued the conversing in
front of her place until Jill got home, then we left.

I think it was still before midnight, so I wasn't tired yet so I started jaming on
my mini guitar. Hopefully I didn't bother jimmy, but the neighbors I knew were up.
I could hear them too.

Renee threatened to go running with me tonight. I'm going to have to break out my
ultra-mini shorts, leg warmers, and headband. She still has 4 hours, from now, to
back out(for a second time.) But whatever happens, I'll have plenty to talk about

Speaking of which, I gave jeff a few phone numbers in case he backs out, he can send
in some REAL dude strippers.

I'm listening to my Swiss Yodeling album right now. I've been getting a little rusty.

Monday, February 19, 2007

Daily Update

As I was leaving work on Friday I was informed that there would be no Presidential
Holiday for Jimbo. Due to the importance and time sensitive nature of our work we
wouldn't be observing it. My boss said he likes the presidents, but not that much.
(and less than half of the office are citizens of our country, that may have
something to do with it as well.)

After work on Friday I started calling the crew to see if they were up for anything.
after rallying the troops, we went to a chinese buffet over on wilshire Blvd. Jeff
'the Coupon Collector' said he could get the deal of a lifetime, 5 bucks off entire
bill. (Which meant that Me, Josh, Jessica, Jeffie, and Scott all got One dollar
off, how great.) It was good food. I loaded up my first plate as much as possible.
I practically had to use the shrimp as a gaurdrail on the plate, just so I could
pile everything higher, but then I realized, Oh wait, its a buffet, I can come back
in 5 minutes and do just the same. I dove into my first plate, using utinsles about
half the time, I did some pretty good damage, but toward the end, I hit a wall. I
abruptly had no desire to eat anymore, so I stopped. Then when I didn't go back for
plates 2, 3, and 4. I was severly mistreated verbally. The kids decided to make
fun of me. Don't get me wrong, I could have gone back and gotten my money's worth,
but I decided not to. I also decided to be the better man and not retaliate against
their attacks. I simply held my ground and took the pressure. I mean it's not like
it was Thanksgiving!

After the glorious food fest we went to Jessica's to watch Starsky & Hutch.

The whole time while hanging out Scott was feeling a little insecure cause the
'J-crew' was in full force, (also Plewe wasn't there to hold his hand) and he was
an outsider with a Non-J name. So I decided to give him the honorary tilte of
'Justin', (as in Justin Timberlake.) I kept telling Scott/Justin to 'Bring Sexy
Back' for us. He didn't want to, I'm sure it was just too new for him. He'll get it

Enter the Moving Season: On Saturday mornig I was woken up by a call from Tim.
Some idiot forgot to turn my phone to silent. He was recruting people to help Paul
move, and he was desperate. I agreed reluctantly. I made myself pancakes before
they got there to pick me up. They didn't have that much to move, but it was all
heavy. The worst was a big freaking fold out bed/couch! My back is still angry at
it. It looked mid sized, soft and cumfy, but Oh NO, it lied to my eyes. under the
cushions it was a solid mass of twisted steel and lead. Just picking it up was
strenuious, but then we had to manuver it thru a hall, around a corner, thru a
corridor, around a corner with stairs, and down some more stairs. And that was just
round one. To get it from the U-haul into the new place was even more interesting.
It was an old building that used to be a hotel (wide hallways, no door on bathroom,
smells like smoke). He was only on the second floor of corse. The only way to get
the bloody thing up the stairs was to turn the couch in a way that would make the
bed part want to fold out with every movement. Then half way up the stairs when
they got super excited and pushed me over backwards while trying to carry said
couch, I had to put it down and re-evaluate. then leaning over from two stairs up,
trying to bend over and pick this beast up from that point was a little awkward. We
finally managed after about giving up twice. Luckily my keen intuition and fine
tuned mental acuracy kicked in and we got the job done. On the way out after
conquring this feat Tim was trying to be the nice guy and point out all the damage
we did to the walls, stairs, doors, etc. I told him to maybe keep that stuff to
himself and not talk so loud. He's a lawyer, he should know not to admit
guild/fault to the entire appartment building(really thin walls).

Now I need to explain the pain i'm in from this adventure. Not immediatly, but
shortly thereafter I felt like I had been rolled over with a Jim size Rolling Pin.
Its all muscle pain. I believe its the area between the Rhomboid and Infraspinatus
Muscle Groups on my back.

I went home and instead of taking a nap like I wanted to, I decided to continue
Fight ing the Battle of My Life. Ah, the joy of video games. It was a good
decision on my part. I continued to battle the evil forces that have plaguing
Cyrodill. I have succesfully been infiltrating the 'Theives Guild'. I now only
have one more quest before I become the Theives Master. I also worked long and hard
at overtaking the Dark Brotherhood. Apparently I was killing the wrong people, so I
saught out the perpatrator, and destroyed him. By doing that, the head Deity of
'The Black Hand' named me to the Listener position (top of the food chain). that
means that I now listen to the voices that tell me who to kill, and now I tell
someone else to do it. Its a step or two up from where I was before. Maybe
tomorrow I'll continue to find the items that the emperor has requested I find, its
part of the main quest.

I briefly helped Jessica with 'computer stuff' in the late afternoon. Then we went
to Emily Winnie's B-Day party. It was cool. Good food. Lots of people I didn't
know. Most people formed groups around the other people they knew, so on one half
of the yard it was school friends, and the other half it was church frends.
Afterward we went to Kristens to watch Bruce Almighty. It was funny.

After that its where it gets complicated. I dropped jeff off at his place and I
drove Josh up to ucla so he could get his scooter. We found it. But we were in the
middle of an important conversation, and after like 5 minutes I shut my car off.
after 5-10 more minutes ( I don't really know how long it was cause I wasn't keeping
track) a cop car pulls up behind me flashing his lights. Oh boy. I don't think I
did anything wrong, but he could probably smell my Trojan Blood and wanted to harass
me. Cop-Boy came up and wanted to know what was going on. Well, we were talking;
and I was dropping the Big-fella off at his half pint size scooter. but I don't know
what I was thinking, I had 'girl-talk' on my mind so I answered and said we were
having 'girl talk'... the second that those words came out of my mouth, I felt like
I was kissing George Michael, so in order to rebound away from that I blurted out
"Except we're dudes! Were Dude-talking!, no no we're dudes 'locker-room talking'!"
He staired at me for a second or two, then asked where the passenger was. Oh ya,
cause I had already dropped jeff off, and Josh was int he back seat. I explained
that 'jerk-boy' in the back wanted to pretend that I was his chauffeur. He again
staired at me for a second or two. He then asked if I had been drinking. I don't
really get asked that that often, so I started giggling. and then imeadiatly to
staight face said "no of corse not". then straight back to laughing. then decided
to add " didn't you see my licence plates? I'm from Utah, Of corse I don't drink."
so now he wanted to see my drivers licence. Oh ya, well I changed it to a
california licence months ago; so the Utah comment didn't really work. I assured
him it was correct information and he told me to move along. I'm happy that he
didn't ask more questions. he probably thought that at least I was a 'fruit'. And
Josh is the one who goes there :) On the short drive off campus, I felt like a
retard, and was pissed that I had actually said outloud the words 'girl talk'. at a
red light josh rolls up next to my car window and exclaims "Girl-Talk?!? Fag!" and
laughed. And I continued feeling like a retard as I laughed at myself. I'm just
lucky the cop didn't start hitting on me.

Thats the story that Kristen wanted me Not to leave out Renee, and Kristen thats why
I'm sending this to you is to prove that it was added. But seriously, lets just
forget about that story now. Its no longer funny.

So on Sunday morning I actually got up early, (around 10). So I convinced myself to
go running, cause I missed this last thrusday and friday. It was a nice morning, so
I went to the country club. Turns out that they have a farmers market on the street
that the Greens keepers are usually 'smoking grass'. As I started I happened to be
30 paces behind some chick. I don't know her name, but I'll refer to her as 'Hot
Pants'. I felt pretty good. I was warmed up, kind of. I wasn't the campion of the
day cause Hot Pants was definatly faster, but I felt like a baby Springbok, just
opening up on the open road for the first time. I was going pretty fast. So Fast
that I noticed that bugs were splattering on my sunglasses like on a car windshield.
With every gracefull leap I took I was getting closer to hot pants. That was until
she noticed a guy following, I think, so she sped up. She passed another dude that
was a bit slower, I thought of following him for a split second, but then I realized
I didn't want to be stairing at some dude's ass for the next 20 minutes. and
besides the ponytail was facinating to watch bounce back n forth in a figure 8 type
manner. It definatly wasnt' the girl I was following weeks ago, but whatever, I did
a lot better on the uphill side. By the last side I was really pooped, but I
couldn't give up on Hot-Pants. I feel I do better when trying to keep up with
someone, otherwise a 20 min. run could take 45min. and I wouldn't even know it.

After chruch I was kind of hanging out with some of the girls there, and I think
they said it was cool if I went Visiting teaching with them, so I did. Why not,
right? I was planning on behaving the whole time, but I think Because I was there,
everyone else thought it was 'talk-time' so there were a lot of visitors to the
'visiting teaching circle'. Just a little disruptive; uh, sorry bout that. Most of
the visiting teaching consisted of Guys stink, they did this..., they did that...,
They are rude, they are dumb, so I was there to stick up for the male race, but then
I started thinking that these comments were made just cause I was there. so then I
just shut up. (man, what is that Renee Labor teaching those girls in R.S.?)
Definatly an educational experience for jimbo.

I made spagetti at my place agian for some of the kids. it was fun. Then we went
to Jeff's so he could practice his cookie making skills. During that event I had
complained about not being able to move, and Autumn said she had taken massage
classes, so I immediatly asked where I should lay down. I will now call Autumn
'Magic Fingers'. At first I was ticklish, but then it was like she was jabbing her
nuckles in between each of my ribbs! oh the pain! and I swear, she's MaYBE 100
pounds. so I figured that the pain wasn't real, so I took it like a Man. Now, I
know that in the long run it will be better for jim's back muscles, but wow, it was
like she was stabbing my nerves and pulling them like a marionette!

Monday Morning: I woke up to another beautiful European day. A thick cloud cover,
light rain, and an aura in the air that 'no one wants to talk to me'. Just like the
mission. I love it. It all cleared out by afternoon. upsetting. I was hoping all
the people I know having a beach party/BBQ would be rained out, but oh well. Shame
on me for thinking that, right?

I'm listening to Frank Sinatra.

Lunch was sponsored by Quizno's.